Test This! (Trash Talk From A Guaranteed Winner)
The "news" is that next Sunday night, January 20th, at 8:00 p.m. eastern time, I will be appearing as a member of "The Bloggers" team on the live, nation-wide Test The Nation gameshow on the CBC in Canada.
The format--team vs. team vs. the entire country-- is a great one, and has been a huge hit in the 40 nations in which it has aired.
But that's not the "story."
The story is, like Joe Namath in the 1967 Super Bowl (ask your parents), I am guaranteeing a win for my team. Let me reiterate in big and bold:
I HEREBY GUARANTEE
"THE BLOGGERS" WILL WIN
CBC's TEST THE NATION
I am comfortable and confident in laying my reputation on the line for two reasons: My team, and the competition.
"The Bloggers" (listed at bottom) are the brilliant future of this country. Don't ask how I lucked out to be part of this illustrious group of thinkers, commentators and rabble-rousers, but I did...and I fully intend to ride their dazzling coattails to an easy win.
Now, just look at the sorry bunch we're up against:
Celebrity Lookalikes--
Maybe one of you wannabes should've looked like Einstein instead.
Cab Drivers--
Read this blog post. 'Nuff said. (But please hang out until the end of the show to drive us to our victory party. That is, if you can find your way to the studio in the first place...)
Chefs--
Get into the kitchen; you can't stand the heat.
Flight Crews--
Sorry, no Auto-Pilots here, guys. In your words, "Buh-bye!"
Backpackers--
No chance, greenies. 15 minutes under the lights in a TV studio and you'll be gasping for air.
Fightin' words? Of course. But I'm prepared to back them up.
If, by some freak accident, The Bloggers actually don't win, I will agree to endure the humiliation of being spanked on air during the closing credits by co-host Wendy Mesley. If Brent Bambury wants to join in, so be it. (If you could think up a nastier payback, lemme know.)
Lemme take this even further. In an email from show producer Molly Duignan last week, she said:
"...there is a $5000 Sunquest Vacations travel voucher for the highest scorer of all the in-studio participants on the Test!"
So, to sweeten the pot and double down on my bet, if by some fluke that the highest scorer in-studio is NOT a blogger, I will hand over a cheque of $500 made out to the charity of choice of the (very) lucky winner.
So there you have it. Not just one guaranteed win, but two. Crazy perhaps...but what did you expect from a guy who's blog starts with Pow!?
As promised, here's the list of next Sunday's winners, with links to their excellent blogs.
- Dan Arnold
- Jon Arnold (blog)
- Christopher Bird (blog)
- Buzz Bishop (blog)
- Rebecca Bollwitt (blog)
- Ryan Couldrey (blog)
- Ryan Cousineau (blog)
- Katharine Hay (blog)
- Jesse Hirsch (blog)
- David Jones (blog)
- Allyson Kenning (blog)
- John Klein
- Andree Lau (blog)
- Lainey Liu
- Amber Macarthur (blog)
- John Martz
- Hugh McGuire (blog)
- Mark McIntyre (blog)
- Patrick Metzger (blog)
- Ryan Porter (blog)
- Adam Schwabe
- Craig Silverman (blog)
- Julien Smith (blog)
- Allan Sorenson (blog)
- Rick Spence (blog)
- Graeme Stewart (blog)
- David Topping (blog)
- Kate Trgovac (blog)
- Rannie Turingan (blog)
- James Viloria (blog)
- Karen Whaley (blog)
- Frank Yang
See ya in the Winner's Circle!
